Where did you grow up?
Originally I lived in White City. Then I moved to Croydon South London in year 6 and I went to St Mary’s for the remainder of the year 6 period. Now I’m here in York.
What was St Mary’s like?
I think it was quite different, because Pope John where I was in South London wasn’t that diverse however St Mary’s was really diverse. This was when I started to find myself but the journey had only started. Not that much happened because I was only there for a year.
Was there any turbulence throughout your childhood?
From the age of 4 I was diagnosed with moderate hearing loss. So whilst I was growing up I had speech problems and learning difficulties. When I was 4 I couldn’t speak or anything. So, growing up I always felt like I was put into a box, almost like because I had a hearing aid I was told ‘you can’t do this’ , ‘maybe you should sit over here’ or ‘do as little work as you can’.
I had to overcome these things and prove to people that I could do just as much as people who don’t wear hearing aids.
Childhood bullying too but I think most people experience this.
Do you feel that you have overcome these issues? If so, how?
Having parents that really pushed me, parents that told me to work three times as hard and parents telling me that it would be worth it in the end. So, if I got homework and the teacher told me to do 2 pages my dad would tell me ‘Do 6 pages’. He wasn’t telling me to do that for his pleasure, he was trying to instil a mentality that no one should put me down due to my limitations. I had that mentality and I was always moving on, and here I am now.
If it wasn’t for my parents and how they pushed me I don’t think I would be at university. I would probably have been in a school specifically for children with learning difficulties and I don’t think I would have advanced as fast.
People are always surprised when they find out that I wear a hearing aid because they assume that people with hearing aids aren’t supposed to speak as much.
Were you ever embarrassed about your transition from child to adolescent to woman? If so, why?
Yes, I definitely think I was embarrassed at times maybe because in my household there was a lot of repression on this subject. I went to an all-girls school, so there was a lot of repression there too, if you had sex; at say 15, you would be called a slut, slag or something like that. So it wasn’t necessarily just at home it was all around me too.
There was a lot of negative stigma attached to relationships too. Going to an all-girls Catholic school there was always that negative stigma. I wasn’t growing up backwards but I didn’t have that much awareness. But when I got to sixth form all of that changed, and everyone grew up.
Did your family bring you up as a Christian?
Yes, my mum is Catholic and my dad is Methodist. So I would go to both churches, but I was baptised Catholic, I went to catholic schools all my life.
I was really religious until sixth form when I started doing philosophy and I started challenging the way that I thought. I was never introduced to questions like ‘Who is God?’, ‘Does God exists?’ and ‘Is God a woman?’ I had never looked at it from that way. Compared to now and then, my views on religion are different. Before, when I spoke about religion I would say that religion was the reason for so many problems but now I’m more critical. Now, I see it’s much bigger than that, I know that even without religion there would still be sexism, racism, and class issues and there would still be so many other issues.
Even though I’m not religious I wouldn’t be so quick to bash it, as I was before. I’m always open to the ideas of praying and spirituality.
Also, now that my mum is a single parent she sometimes she finds solace in praying and going to church, I don’t believe but I don’t want her to feel lonely.
Can you remember any key moments that shaped you in your formative years?
2013 summer, I went to Berlin. By this time I was starting to get into History and Politics more, and all these things were right in front of me. The Berlin Wall and concentration camps. I also went with people who were really into feminism, I wasn’t really introduced to this ideology and I wasn’t really close to the people. It really shaped me and my ideas. It was turning point in my life, I became friends with people that I wasn’t friends with before. This trip and sixth form (in general) really challenged me as a person.
This was also the point that I cut my hair because I was always into wearing weaves, braids and extensions.
My parents divorcing also opened my eyes to reality. It was painful because I had lived with my Dad my whole life. These things open your eyes, and they make you think that everything isn’t pink and fairies.
I think having a Tumblr and Twitter and following really interesting people and engaging in interesting books has changed my life. I can see how much I have grown in the last 4 or 5 years. I don’t really speak to my friends from secondary school as much because I became aware of so many things. People that I thought were my best friends aren’t because I look back and think about the things they said and how that actually made you feel.
Can you remember any key moments that shaped your sexuality?
I have a background where sexuality is repressed and sex just isn’t spoken about. When I was in year 11, I was in a 2 year relationship with this guy who was 2 years older than me, but I can now see that that relationship wasn’t healthy at all.
I would say my mum and dads divorce changed me. It was so painful, and we all dealt with it in different ways. I would pretend to be strong for my mum and sisters but deep down I was suffering in silence. I became promiscuous and I started to get with people because I didn’t really want to think about the divorce. I knew it was hurting me, but everything was fun and frisky.
I then realised that I needed to take care of myself. I started reading about black sexuality and black feminism, which shaped my viewpoint on myself. Black women being sexual is seen as a negative thing within feminism. I’ve looked up to black artists who celebrate their sexuality like Lil Kim, Missy Elliot and Beyoncé, who are slightly problematic, but the general gist is that they are black women celebrating their sexuality. I am so glad that there is this platform to celebrate our sexuality.
It all been a gradual process.
Did you ever face any backlash as a result of your appearance?
Because I am dark I have grown up being told that being dark is not what people want. So I have faced colourism (a social stigma where being dark isn’t good. Which is why we have bleaching creams) and definitely racism.
From primary school I was surrounded by lighter skinned people, so I thought ‘Why can’t I be lighter?’ It happened more in secondary school and I internalised this in a negative way. Girls would make comments about how I looked, about how I 
was too dark and how I was too ugly to ever have a boyfriend. It was all so negative.
I’ve always been taught to think I wasn’t good enough. It still happens now, but I have the confidence now. My boyfriend always tried to help me in shaping the way I view myself. I’ve looked at darker black women and how they are confident, I’ve read really positive things about these women. I’ve also read about white supremacy and social stigmas towards skin tones, which makes me believe that racism is a learned behaviour.
Cutting my hair was liberating and I could see my facial features. The first time I said ‘I am beautiful and I love myself’ I was about 17 years old, and it was the most painful thing to say because I had internalised all of this anti-blackness and hatred. When I said I loved myself I couldn’t stop crying.
I find pleasure in telling other women that they are beautiful, telling women to uplift themselves and believe in themselves. Simply because nobody ever did that to me.
Would you consider yourself to be a feminist?
Yes, being a feminist is not just a label, it’s a journey. It’s about unlearning so much that you have been taught, like gender roles, sexist slurs, misogyny and patriarchy.
I see a lot of things as a feminist issue. If I’m in a seminar and we’re talking about imperialism I would see it as a feminist issue.
The Iraq War is a feminist issue because there are widows of those who have fought on both sides as a result of this war. Widows who are now vulnerable especially with their children. They are prone to being homeless or perhaps experience sexual assault.
My mum wouldn’t consider herself to be a feminist. But I can see that she is. She’s a single mum, doing everything on her own, long shifts, out spoken, she fights for her rights and she fights for her children.
Are you pro-life or pro-choice?
Pro-choice. I don’t believe that pro-choice means that you have to agree with abortions but I think it means that despite your own opinions what women choose to do you will always support them through it.
What are your feelings on casual sex?
As long as people are safe, consenting, aware, taking the right contraceptives and the person you’re doing it with has a mutual respect; it’s fine.
When I engaged casual sex with this guy, I realised that it damaged my mind set and my health because sometimes it was consensual but also it wasn’t. It also wasn’t healthy for me.
It was wrong for me because I was already in pain as a result of my parents’ divorce and casual sex caused me even more pain.
Are you currently in a relationship(s)?
Yes with this guy called Jordan, we’ve known each other for nearly a year and a half. He’s great, definitely great. He’s really into feminism and he’s into all the things I believe in too.
The fact that he is white makes it hard at times for him to understand things like racism fully. But the main thing for him is to remain accountable. When I’m talking about black sexuality he tries to understand why it’s important for me as a black woman. He always tries to understand.
What are your feelings on marriage?
I’ve never really thought about marriage. I’ve always said that it’s down to people’s choices, but we must analyse the roots of marriage. Is it a religious institution or a societal thing?
I think it’s important to challenge and question marriage. Marriage is all about keeping women as property. Even though we live in a western society and those ideas about marriage have changed, there are still a lot of issues when it comes to marriage.
However, I like the idea of a traditional Ghanaian marriage with the attire, the food and everything.
What does the word woman mean to you?
Diversity. It’s not about biological functions, some women don’t have a uterus, and does that make them less of a woman? NO.
How do you feel about the media’s portrayal of women?
So much to say on this. First of all, there’s an amazing black producer called Shonda Rhimes, I need to give myself a moment! She created Grey’s Anatomy, How to Get Away with Murder and Scandal, all shows with really diverse cast.
Shonda Rhimes has broken all stereotypes. The lead role in How to Get Away with Murder is Viola Davis, I love her. One time I cried because I had never ever ever ever ever seen a dark woman as the lead in a mysterious and strong role. If I have, it has been a very negative role.
Overall, it is not good enough. There are not enough female led roles.
When it comes to Trans issues, you have heterosexual white men playing Trans roles. For the Trans community these films mean a lot, I think it would be better to actually have Trans women playing these roles instead.
You have white women playing Asian roles. Which is a massive problem.
What do you deeply love about yourself?
I love the fact that I am always outspoken. I love the fact that I am passionate about certain issues. If someone says something ridiculous I can feel my blood boiling. I love the fact that I have grown a lot. I love the fact that I can challenge the way that I think, I am constantly changing.
I love my process, my journey, I love that there is always something new for me.
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